The History of Manure

 Articles, Featured, Humor  1 Response »
Jan 152012
 

I know we were all wondering….

Manure : In the 16th and 17th centuries, everything had to be transported by ship and it was also before the invention of commercial fertilizers, so large shipments of manure were quite common.

It was shipped dry, because in dry form it weighed a lot less than when wet, but once water (at sea) hit it, not only did it become heavier, but the process of fermentation began again, of which a by product is methane gas of course. As the stuff was stored below decks in bundles you can see what could (and did) happen. Methane began to build up below decks and the first time someone came below at night with a lantern, BOOOOM! Continue reading »

 Posted by at 10:55 am

Truth in Advertising

 Articles, Humor  No Responses »
Sep 202010
 

Event Prospect……….Big, Fast Horse
Dressage Prospect…….Big, Slow Horse
Hack Prospect………..Pretty Colour
Sporting Prospect…….Short, Fast Horse
Eventing Prospect…….Ugliest head you ever saw Penning Prospect………..Fast Horse which can turn
Endurance Prospect……Fast Horse which will turn sometimes Flashy………………White Socks
Attractive…………. Bay Continue reading »

 Posted by at 7:58 pm

A ad for a pony off craigslist

 Humor  No Responses »
Sep 202010
 

I have a used bright purple pony halter for sale. Adjustable and in fairly good condition.

A pony will be included with the halter. I currently call this pony “Juicy” although he goes by many other names as well, depending on my mood and his behavior.

This pony is just waiting to become someone’s little dream pony. Continue reading »

 Posted by at 7:08 pm

WOMAN’S WEEK AT THE GYM

 Articles, Humor  No Responses »
May 072010
 

Dear Diary,
For my birthday this year, I  purchased a week of personal training at the local health club.  Although I am still in great shape since being a high school football cheerleader 43 years ago, I decided it would be a good idea to go ahead and give it a try. Continue reading »

 Posted by at 10:31 pm

Whoever said History was boring!

 Humor  No Responses »
Apr 042010
 

There is an old Hotel/Pub in Marble Arch, London …

…which used to have gallows adjacent. Prisoners were taken to the gallows
(after a fair trial of course!) to be hung.
The horse drawn dray, carting the prisoner was accompanied by an armed guard,
who would stop the dray outside the pub and ask the prisoner if he would like ”ONE LAST DRINK”.
If he said YES it was referred to as “ONE FOR THE ROAD”.
If he declined, that prisoner was “ON THE WAGON”
So there you go!
More bleeding history…
They used to use urine to tan animal skins, so families used to all pee
in a pot & then once a day it was taken & sold to the tannery.
If you had to do this to survive you were “Piss Poor”.
But worse than that were the really poor folk who couldn’t even afford to buy a pot they
“Didn’t have a pot to Piss in” & were the lowest of the low.
And that’s the truth…Now, whoever said History was boring!

 Posted by at 3:29 pm

In Praise of Marriage–The Power of a Wife’s Love on Her Husband’s Deathbed.

 Humor  No Responses »
Dec 302009
 

A very old man lay dying in his bed. In death’s doorway, he suddenly smelled the aroma of his favorite chocolate chip cookie wafting up the stairs.

He gathered his remaining strength and lifted himself from the bed.  Leaning against the wall, he slowly made his way out of the bedroom, and with even greater effort forced himself down the stairs, gripping the railing with both hands.

With labored breath, he leaned against the door frame, gazing into the kitchen.  Were it not for death’s agony, he would have thought himself already in heaven.

There, spread out on newspapers on the kitchen table were literally hundreds of his favorite chocolate chip cookies.

Was it heaven?  Or was it one final act of heroic love from his devoted wife, seeing to it that he left this world a happy man?

Mustering one great final effort, he threw himself toward the table.  The aged and withered hand, shaking, made its way to a cookie at the edge of the table, when he was suddenly smacked with a spatula by his wife.

“Stay out of those,” she said. “They’re for the funeral.

 Posted by at 11:30 am